A Year in the Life of Santa Claus
And relax. It may seem like I only work for one day a year but you have no idea how untrue that is. There’s the naughty/nice list that is continually updated and has to be checked. Presents to make and wrap, and believe me there’s a lot of presents. Elves to manage and look after and not too mention the reindeer. Still it should be a bit easier next year at least I won’t have to manually plan my route anymore as now the sleigh is being fitted with one of those Satnav things. I just hope it doesn’t get me lost.
Anyway for today, and the rest of the week, myself and Mrs Claus are going to take a vacation. We’re heading off to St Lucia for a break before work starts again in the new year. I can’t wait, just got to find my swim shorts.
Well the holiday was fantastic but a little shorter than I would have liked. The homecoming wasn’t quite as expected either, the elves had decided to have a New Years Eve party and pretty much trashed the work-shop. They’re through there now cleaning up the place. Luckily none of the tools got damaged as I would hate to think how we would replace them before next christmas. Still I suppose I shouldn’t grumble, they work hard all year it would be a bit mean of me to not allow them to have even one party.
Mrs Claus has now decided that she would like a new kitchen. Why she couldn’t have mentioned this before christmas, when I was struggling to decide what to get her as a present is beyond me. Still she does do so much baking and cooking for me and the elves and I love her so much that it is the least I can do for her. I’ll start phoning the kitchen stores now, although I’m not sure it will be a quick delivery up here.
Mrs Claus has finally settled on a kitchen. I have called the supplier and after spending quite awhile getting them to accept that I was who I said I was, they have agreed to accept an order. Delivery is normally 6-8 weeks but they have said I may have to collect it myself. Looks like the reindeer will be getting an extra outing this year. Dasher will be happy.
Rudolph is ill. We think he has Reindeer-flu. His nose his running and it’s even more red than normal. Mrs Claus thinks he’s putting it on in order to get out of his exercise sessions but I’m not so sure. The vet is looking at him now but hopefully he’ll be okay.
Rudolph is definitely feeling better, he’s managed to eat nearly a whole bag of carrots today. He’ll be back to doing his exercise session tomorrow, although I’m not sure he’s going to like that I think he’s enjoyed having the elves looking after him.
The first presents have been made. Although it’s getting harder and harder for the elves to keep up with the manufacturing schedule. Gifts these days take so much longer to make. I remember the days when all kids wanted were some wooden blocks and toy cars, now it’s all Playstations and Computers I don’t know what will be thought of next. Still I did quite like playing pac-man so I’m sure I’ll get used to these. The problem is thought that it’s so hard on the elves, they used to be able to get January through to March as a holiday and now they have to start making gifts in January. By the time christmas gets here they are so tired and that’s when it really starts to get busy.
Mrs Claus has asked that question again. Why don’t I retire? I know that it’s hard work but this isn’t a job, it’s a calling and delivering all those gifts to the young children just makes me so happy. I can’t imagine ever passing on this role to anyone else. I’ve told her maybe I’ll retire next year but we both know that I won’t.
Maybe I should retire. I’ve just been making a new list and have checked it twice but it just seems to get longer and longer. Luckily most of the kids on it this time are nice kids, I hate seeing them on the naughty list, makes me feel so sad to think that they might not get any presents.
The elves have done an amazing job in getting ahead in the workshop, so we’ve all had a day off today and Mrs Claus has thrown us all a party. She really does make the most fantastic cakes and cookies ever. I’ve never seen a plate of chocolate cookies vanish as quickly as these ones did when the Elves saw them. Got roped in to trying one of those new games consoles myself today too. It wasn’t what I was expecting, I played a game where I had to dance! It wasn’t my finest day ever, although at least the music was good. Dancing to I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday was so much fun. Even if I did get beaten by an elf!
The new kitchen is ready. The Reindeer are ready to go. In a few hours Mrs Claus will have her new kitchen. I’ve never seen her so excited.
The new kitchen is fitted and Mrs Claus loves it. She hasn’t stopped baking since she got the oven in. Unfortunately, all these cakes are not good for my waistline. I’m going to need to have my trousers altered again!
Well this was unexpected. Two of my Elves Peter and Griselda have announced they are to get married. I didn’t even know they were seeing each other. I’m happy for them though, it’s been a long while since we’ve had a wedding here. They have asked if they can go to New York for their Honeymoon, I’m not so sure about that but I’ll think about it. New York is a big city and they’re such little people I’d hate for them to get lost. But I suppose they could take that Satnag thingy before it goes into my sleigh. They haven’t set a date for the wedding yet but they want it sometime in June apparently.
I know I shouldn’t, but I really dislike easter. The Bunny hogs all the limelight at this time of year and I’m pretty much forgotten about. The only time I’m ever remembered is when a child decides he know longer believes in the easter bunny anymore and therefore can no longer believe in me. That nearly always changes at christmas again when they start to think about their gifts but still it’s frustrating. Probably more so for the easter bunny though as they very rarely get their belief back in him. And as for the tooth-fairy, well it’s best to not even mention her.
I am so glad the easter celebrations are out of the way. Giving out easter eggs to every single elf takes a long while and it is so hard for me not to just eat the eggs before I hand them over. Mrs Claus did get me one easter egg but I’ve eaten it all now. Apparently we are dieting for the rest of the year although I’m not sure Mrs Claus will be able to resist baking her cakes for that long.
Well the diet lasted one day. Mrs Claus woke up this morning and the first thing she did was start baking a massive chocolate cake. I was good though, I did only have 4 slices.
Chicken Pox! The Elves have Chicken Pox! What am I going to do? Nearly half of them have come down with it and are too ill to work. There’s presents to be made and wrapped and no one to do them. Mrs Claus did try to help make up some but she’s not good with a screwdriver (or at following instructions). I hope the elves get better soon!
Seven days on and most of the elves seem to be better and back to work. They’ve all agreed to pull extra shifts to help catch up with the back-log but only if I let them have christmas music on in the background. Normally I don’t like to listen to christmas music until December but I guess I don’t really have much choice. Just as long as they don’t expect me to sing-a-long.
The backlog is all caught up now, in fact we’re about a day ahead. So myself and the elves are taking half a day off. I asked them what they wanted to do with the time and they want an afternoon watching movies with some popcorn. The first movie they’ve chosen is Elf. These elves have no imagination.
Peter and Griselda have set a date for the wedding. They’ve decided on the 1st June. There’s nothing like giving people notice! They have asked to keep it to a fairly small affair with just myself, Mrs Claus and all the other hundreds of elves. I’m not sure who else they were planning on inviting but if this is what they call a small affair I’d hate to see a big party.
Mrs Claus and I have decided to give Peter and Griselda a couple of weeks off after their wedding and to let them have their Honeymoon in New York, we’ve even booked a hotel for them. We’re going to surprise them with it at their wedding reception. I can’t wait to see their faces. Mrs Claus has also decided to buy them their own Satnav so that the engineer elves can go ahead and fit the sleigh out with it’s own. That will give me time to test it before christmas.
Have just gone through the naughty/nice list now (I think from now on I’m just going to call it the list). I’m impressed with how well the children are behaving this year, it’s a shame I can’t say the same for the adults though.
It’s a week until the wedding and I’ve never seen Peter so nervous. He was making a cuddly toy today and ended up sticking a donkey’s head onto a monkey’s body. I’ve told him just to calm down and not too worry but I think that’s easier said than done.
The day before the wedding and all the elves are excited. The workshop is shutting down at 7pm tonight and we’re all going to relax and throw a little pre-wedding party to try and calm everyone’s nerves. I’m not sure Peter and Griselda are going to get much sleep tonight though.
Well it’s been a long day but the wedding was absolutely sensational. Peter and Griselda both looked so nice and they do make such a lovely couple. They were thrilled with their present and can’t wait for their honeymoon now. Without sounding like a bit of a scrooge though, i’m glad it’s over, now the workshop can return to normal and we can concentrate on getting presents made for christmas.
OH MY GOD! We’ve been burgled! It must have happened last night while we were all at the wedding. The workshop was all locked up but they managed to break through a couple of the windows. It looks like about half of the presents that we’d made have been stolen and that’s a lot of presents! We’re never going to have time to re-make them all. The police got here pretty quickly considering the distance they had to travel but they’re not overly hopeful of catching them. I don’t know what I’m going to do!
We’ve managed to tidy up the workshop and the elves are working harder than I’ve ever seen them work before to try and remake some of the presents. I admire them so much for how they’re all pulling together but I don’t think it’s going to be enough.
Amazing! The police have caught the thieves! They found them in a boat just around Norway the presents are on the way back up here now. I’m so relieved.
Well given all the excitement at the start of the month the rest of June has been pretty uneventful. My sleigh has been fitted with the satnav so I’m taking the reindeer and sleigh out for a test-drive tomorrow to make sure it works.
The test drive of the satnav has not gone well. I put the address in I wanted to find but it hasn’t worked. I didn’t bring a map with me and the satnav doesn’t recognize the North Pole as a destination and I have no idea how I’m going to get home. I’m lost. Well and truly lost.
Well it took me awhile but I finally managed to build a fire, using the emergency kit in the sleigh, to keep warm overnight. Given how cold it is for July i’m guessing I’m somewhere in the southern Hemisphere probably near Antarctica. I’m going to use that as my basis and try flying north until I see somewhere I recognise. I’ve flown all over the world so it shouldn’t be too hard to find something right. I bet Mrs Claus is so worried, i’m going to be in for a telling off when I get back.
It took a while but I finally flew over the Amazon Rainforest and I’m now on my way home. I think it will be just after mid-night when I make it back. I can tell the Reindeer are looking forward to getting back I don’t think they’ve travelled this fast for a long while.
I got back at 1am and Mrs Claus was not happy. She actually came at me with a rolling pin. She said it was because she thought I was another burglar, but given we’ve had one burglary up here in well forever, I’m not sure I believe that to be the case. Once she’d calmed down she did give me a hug and told me she was worried so I guess all is okay. Will need to be on my best behaviour for awhile though.
We’re going to have a baby!
I should just clarify my last entry. When I said “We’re going to have a baby!” I didn’t actually mean myself and Mrs Claus, we’re way too old for that. I meant Peter and Griselda. They’re so happy, and we’re happy for them too. The only downside is that while pregnancy in humans lasts for 9 months in elves it’s only 6 months which means the baby should be due right around Christmas.
Work seems to be coming along nicely in the workshop. Despite everything that’s happened we’re actually ahead of schedule. It would be so nice if that could continue up until christmas, it’s normally such a mad rush to get everything finished throughout December it would be nice to have a quieter month for once.
We had a surprise visit from the Easter Bunny today. She’s getting worried about the fact that children seem to be getting younger and younger when they stop believing in her. She asked me if I had experienced the same thing, luckily I can’t say I have.
I’ve just updated the Naughty/Nice list. Looks like it’s going to be a good year there’s a lot less children on the naughty list than this time last year. I love it when it’s like this it give me such a warm feeling.
Mrs Claus is taking her annual trip to London to get the Elves christmas presents. We always get them something every year as a thank you for all the hard work they put in. Although I’m not much good at choosing presents so I always leave it to Mrs Claus to choose who gets what. She really looks forward to her yearly trip to London. She has told me not to leave the kitchen in a mess this year though as she doesn’t want to have to tidy it up when she gets back.
Mrs Claus has returned from London and she’s bought some amazing gifts with her, I’m sure the elves will be really happy come christmas day.
It’s been a relatively quiet month, everything seems to be going along nicely in the workshop, the elves and reindeer are all happy and even Mrs Claus isn’t nagging at me too much. Long may it continue.
I spoke too soon. My parents are coming to visit and what’s more they’re coming tomorrow!
Well the visit from my parents wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. My father (who was Father Christmas before me) actually told me that I was doing a good job up here. He’s enjoying his retirement but even he seemed to think it was about time I did the same. But if I do retire who will take over, Mrs Claus and I never had any children so I’d have to find somebody from outside of the family and finding someone who understands the true meaning of christmas is not an easy thing to do.
Well only a month to go, until we start the big build up to christmas day. Presents will start to be sorted by time zone and then by country and we’ll start doing practice runs, that’s when it starts getting really busy up here but I like it like that, I get such a buzz from it all.
Mrs Claus has been complaining of feeling unwell, she does look a bit off colour, I hope it’s nothing serious.
We’ve had a bit of a mini-disaster in the workshop. The elves had been busy wrapping presents and putting the name tags on but they’ve put the wrong tags on the wrong gifts. We’re going to have to go through all of the ones that have been tagged today and re-tag them. Luckily we’re quite a long way ahead of schedule.
All the gifts have been re-tagged and we managed to get a few extra ones done too. The elves were sorry and have promised not to let it happen again, but everybody makes mistakes and no-harm done.
Mrs Claus has gotten worse and has had to be rushed into hospital. We don’t know what’s wrong with her yet but I hope she’s going to be okay.
Mrs Claus is starting to improve, according to the doctors she had picked up some form of viral infection. Luckily she is going to be okay. They think she should be released from hospital in a week or so. I will have to make sure the old place is tidy before she gets back.
Mrs Claus has been released from hospital early. She’s back at the North Pole now but is under strict instructions from the doctors to rest. I give that a week!
Well I was right, the resting didn’t last too long. I came home from the workshop and found her sitting on a stool baking muffins. Still at least she was sitting I suppose.
It’s started to happen. Stores are starting to stock christmas products. In a few weeks, christmas lights will be going on and displays will be set up. It’s a joyous time around the globe but up here, while I do love the sentiment, it gets a little manic.
Just two months to go, the workshop is working flat out, the reindeer are going through all of their practice runs and performing well, although I do believe Prancer has put on some weight. Mrs Claus is now back to full health and is able to help out a little with the preparations which is great. It also means I’m getting to eat proper meals again, which is great.
I’m starting to get a lot of requests from very stressed people asking me to appear at their Santa’s grottos as they have left things too late to find one of those impostors. I know they’re not really impostors but I do find it funny that at this time of year so many people want to be me. Still it is good for the children and does help to keep their belief in me strong.
This is it, I’ve received the last naughty/nice list of the year. Looking down it, it seems like there are a few more names on the naughty side of the list than I would have liked but on the whole, it’s a pretty good year. The number on the naughty list is down over-all which means more presents...I hope we’ll get them all made in time.
I had my first one of Mrs Claus Mince Pies for the year. With her being ill last month she hasn’t been doing as much baking as in previous years. But I got home today, and there they were...and when I say I had one, I actually should have said that I had my first one of the whole batch. There was a whole plate of them on the side and I ate them all, I do love Mince Pies.
I’ve had confirmation from the workshop that all presents will be completed by the 20th December. If this is the case, it will be the earliest the workshop has finished production for the year in well over 75 years. An amazing achievement. I hope they manage to do it, it will give us a couple of days break before the big journey begins.
One month to go!
We’ve had a slight accident in the workshop with a bit of flooding, the skylight was left open overnight and a little bit of snow came down (I might be under-estimating it there a bit). Luckily the presents were all locked up safely so none of them got damaged. A couple of the tools did get some water-damage but they were quickly repaired and we still seem to be on track.
Lights are going on all over the place now, it’s really making the globe look festive. I do love seeing the christmas lights when they start to go up and one of my highlights of doing this job is getting to see all of the amazingly decorated trees when I’m putting the presents underneath them. I’m starting to get excited now, used to be a time when I would get nervous about doing the christmas run but I’ve done it so many times now I just tend to enjoy it.
Most of the christmas letters are written and ready to post to the children. I do love writing the letters and love it even more when the letter I’m writing are a response to letters I’ve received. The children should start to receive them in a couple of days.
Well I haven’t written much recently, but given the time of year that’s understandable. But it’s all done, all of the presents have been made and wrapped and are ready to go. The route has all been planned and now we’re all going to take a couple of days off before heading out on christmas eve. I’m getting so excited now.
Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! Why did I take the last three days off. I need to deliver presents and the sleigh is broken. We’re struggling to find out what is wrong with it, let alone fix it. This has never happened before I don’t know what to do. I’m even contemplating contacting courier firms to see if they can deliver!
We’ve done it! The sleigh is fixed and I’m ready to go, I’m about an hour later leaving than normal but I should still have enough time to get all the presents delivered. Just.